Election 2014: Hell in a hand basket

To the editor:
Well, I guess the Repuglicans won some seats back.-áYuckGÇï. Now we are all gonna have to go to church and worship a White Male Invisible 'Deity'; fly flags on our porches 24/7;-ásend ground-átroops into-áthe Ukraine, Syria, GÇïIran, Iraq, the Gaza Strip, Palestine,-áKenmore, and the-áU-District; -ágo back to coat hanger abortions; send Pat Robertson a Christmas card every year;-á teach Creationism in kindergarten;-áeliminate all science programs in school; make all the 'illegals' go back to their condos in Cabo; end the food stamp program and make people eat grass...if it's good enough for cows it's good enough for the-áunemployed;-á move all the poor to India and China to find jobs; end Obamacare and let the insurance companies raise their rates 20% a year again;-áhire a Madison Avenue ad agency to reassure the public that there is absolutely NO global warming and that we have nothing to worry about; send 20 coal trains a day through every small town in America; reintroduce slavery (white as well as black this time); eliminate all government programs, laws, regulations, and constraints and let the rich run things out in the open instead of in secret and trust them to be nice and always do the right thing (the good old 'honor system') 'under God';-áget rid of those meddlesome Social Security and Medicare systems and make all the 'GÇïslackers'GÇï save for their own retirement on $9.65 cents an hour;GÇï finally unearth and revealGÇï the 'GÇïphony'GÇï Obama birth certificate and show the world that he fooled the FBI, CIA, Republican National Committee, all law enforcement agencies, the Navy Seals, the hospital nurses and doctors, his mother, and God and became President on the sly; GÇïallow Ted Cruz a half hour of national television every day to tell us left-brained 'GÇïjokes'; make FOX News the White House News Channel; GÇïsend Bill O'Reilly to Russia to have a vodka and reason GÇïwith Alexander Putin;GÇï criminalizeGÇï sex before marriage;-ástop the whole country at noon every day to grovel on J.C. Penney towels and point their-árear endsGÇï toward Jerusalem;-áeliminate all churches and religion GÇïexcept for the Episcopalians;-ástart up GÇïthe Crusades; replace the Pope with Joel O'Steen and his blonde narcissist wife; nuke the Middle East and turn the whole thing into glass; make the NFL and NBA all white;-ádisplay GÇïBilly Graham in a glass case in GÇïthe Capitol rotunda; play the National Anthem on the Stock Market floor at closing every day; honor Debby Boone at the Kennedy Center Honors program this year; prove that Jimmy Hendrix wasn't born in America; and make Amazon sell copies of both Harry PotterGÇï books found in the Ronald Reagan Library.
Sounds good, eh??-á :-) Let's go for it!!!
GÇïRobert Van den Akker
Monroe
 

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